Distractions Needed

Even at this early stage of 2012 I’m weary of the election.

It would be a whole lot easier to stomach if I could just watch the upcoming films for The Avengers, from Pixar, the Bond franchise, the first installment of The Hobbit, and the Doctor Who episodes due out in the Fall. And the second half of this season of The Clone Wars.

Passing Down Favorites

I love showing my son stories, toys, movies, and events from my past. Legos from my youth are just as cool to a young kid now. Driving past my old neighborhoods and describing what we did all summer, or any time of year, is a delight. But for some reason, watching a film captures something special.

In most cases the film hasn't changed at all, so you can remember and relive the old days while watching the wonder in the eyes of a new audience. Sometimes, your memory leaves out small details... or details that seem small but become a little larger when they are presented to the kid.

For example, one of my all time favorite comedy films is "Young Frankenstein". I never saw all of the Universal 1930s "Frankenstein" before seeing Mel Brooks' classic parody, at least not to my knowledge. My sister and I rented that movie over and over and over and laughed each and every time.

My wife didn't want me to show the whole thing to him, and I agreed, but mostly since he should see the Universal films first. So downstairs to the comfy couch we go to watch a few key scenes.

Each scene he repeated a line or two with a huge smile on his face! Pure joy... laughing with my son over the same things.

"Put! The candle! Back!"

"Werewolf!"
"Werewolf?"
"There wolf. There castle."

"Sedagive. Give him a sedagive!"
"Sed-a-GIVE?!?!?!"

"Walk this way. This way, this way."

"Frau Blucher."

Unfortunately, he caught a line that I thought he would miss completely. Which line?













As long as he doesn't say it at school, I'm fine.

Stick it Out

Long time, no read. Or write.

Recent claims on Herman Cain's character seem out of place. What's more they seem far beyond the level of scrutiny the press held President Obama to when he was a candidate.

Should the press pursue Mr. Cain like this? Probably. After all, what if it is true?

But Cain doesn't need to be the issue here... the issue is, as often the case, journalists in name only. The type of wretches who give a pass to and cover for Their Guy.

Now, I like Mr. Cain. A lot. But what if there is something to all this?

I remember saying to someone when these claims had no name to them, "If I were collecting material to smear someone, I'd make damn sure that whatever I started with I could follow up with something bigger... and then bigger."

I've been waiting for Sharon Bialek to speak publicly. Not specifically her, but the journalist in me (I have a history) said "There is more," and it would come soon enough.

What to do? Hope my guy can weather all this? After all, if President Clinton could get away with it, why can't *my* guy shake free?

But what if it is true? I don't want my guy to get through simply to even the score. I don't want a guy who can't be trusted.

Has our culture reached the point where this sort of thing, if it is true, isn't important to some people? Most people?

What's more, too many people have instantly gone after Sharon Bialek with venom. I've got my suspicions about her, but I don't know anything.

This whole thing smells of trouble... and someone is going through a lot of it to get this circus running through town.

Moved to Speak

Hmmm... what time is it?
October 2011?!?!?! Talk about oversleeping.

Maybe a good rant might wake me up. For now, I'll just hit the Snooze button. ;)

Mind Your Own Business

Hi, how are you? Having a good day? Mind if I ask a few questions?

Probably a bunch of tedious nonsense. What should you do if you get asked a bunch of tedious nonsense?

I have suggestions:

How many people were living or staying in this house, apartment, or mobile home on April 1, 2010?
We ask this question to help get an accurate count of the number of people in the household on Census Day, April 1, 2010. The answer should be based on the guidelines in the 'Start here' section. We use the information to ensure response accuracy and completeness and to contact respondents whose forms have incomplete or missing information.

I didn’t count at the time, but at least me... well now that you mention it, I wasn't the only one there.

Were there any additional people staying here April 1, 2010 that you did not include in Question 1?
Asked since 1880. We ask this question to help identify people who may have been excluded in the count provided in Question 1. We use the information to ensure response accuracy and completeness and to contact respondents whose forms have incomplete or missing information.

Maybe… I didn’t check.

Is this house, apartment, or mobile home: owned with mortgage, owned without mortgage, rented, occupied without rent?
Asked since 1890. Homeownership rates serve as an indicator of the nation's economy. The data are also used to administer housing programs and to inform planning decisions.

I really don’t know. I have someone else manage that information and my finances. Buy the way, your question has been intrusive since 1890.

What is your telephone number?
We ask for a phone number in case we need to contact a respondent when a form is returned with incomplete or missing information.

Look it up online, if you can find it.

Please provide information for each person living here. Start with a person here who owns or rents this house, apartment, or mobile home. If the owner or renter lives somewhere else, start with any adult living here. This will be Person 1. What is Person 1's name?
Listing the name of each person in the household helps the respondent to include all members, particularly in large households where a respondent may forget who was counted and who was not. Also, names are needed if additional information about an individual must be obtained to complete the census form. Federal law protects the confidentiality of personal information, including names.

Please refer to Person 1 as “Mike Hunt”.

What is Person 1's sex?
Asked since 1790. Census data about sex are important because many federal programs must differentiate between males and females for funding, implementing and evaluating their programs. For instance, laws promoting equal employment opportunity for women require census data on sex. Also, sociologists, economists, and other researchers who analyze social and economic trends use the data.

You’d think I’d know whether Mike Hunt is male or female… looks female, but has a male name.

What is Person 1's age and Date of Birth?
Asked since 1800. Federal, state, and local governments need data about age to interpret most social and economic characteristics, such as forecasting the number of people eligible for Social Security or Medicare benefits. The data are widely used in planning and evaluating government programs and policies that provide funds or services for children, working-age adults, women of childbearing age, or the older population.

I don’t know how old Mike Hunt is… doesn’t look old, though.

Is Person 1 of Hispanic, Latino or Spanish origin?
Asked since 1970. The data collected in this question are needed by federal agencies to monitor compliance with anti-discrimination provisions, such as under the Voting Rights Act and the Civil Rights Act. State and local governments may use the data to help plan and administer bilingual programs for people of Hispanic origin.

Mike Hunt wants you to drop the 40 year old question… because Mike Hunt thinks federal, state, and local agencies should not monitor compliance with anti-discrimination provisions. Mike Hunt thinks you are a quota-queen.

If I need to answer, I’ll try a stab in the dark. Perhaps Mike Hunt is Brazilian… I’m basing that on Mike Hunt’s hairstyle.

What is Person 1's race?
Asked since 1790. Race is key to implementing many federal laws and is needed to monitor compliance with the Voting Rights Act and the Civil Rights Act. State governments use the data to determine congressional, state and local voting districts. Race data are also used to assess fairness of employment practices, to monitor racial disparities in characteristics such as health and education and to plan and obtain funds for public services.

Again, you’d think it wouldn’t be difficult to have a vague idea of what race Mike Hunt is. Mike Hunt is light brown in parts, but also pink.

Does Person 1 sometimes live or stay somewhere else?
This is another question we ask in order to ensure response accuracy and completeness and to contact respondents whose forms have incomplete or missing information.

Probably, but right now I don’t know where Mike Hunt is. Have you seen Mike Hunt? Maybe Mike Hunt is in the parking lot.

Traitor

I practically gave away the keys to the kingdom yesterday. For this I might get branded, drawn and quartered, and sent to the fishes.

A couple of women at work talked about their spouses, boyfriends, and fathers on how they complain. Commercials come on television and the men charge that the company is conspiring and lying to the viewer. One buys a new vehicle, and after a couple of weeks begins to understand that it isn’t quite what he was sold… and he let loose a torrent of vulgarity. (I wish I could have heard it!) Things break, complain! Someone’s late, complain! Favorite show gets canceled, complain! Favorite show doesn’t get canceled but goes from good to terrible, massive complaining! Your team falls apart in the last few minutes, EPIC COMPLAINING!!!

They just couldn’t fathom how the guys would complain so much. The women told them to knock it off, and were then surprised with the guys were shocked.

Here is my betrayal.


I told them that we love to complain. Christ, I live in Minnesota… I complain every winter, in spite of the fact that I like it. Hell, I love it!

I didn't even realize I had revealed such precious information until well after it had tumbled out of my mouth.

In my defense, I got her to admit they women love to complain, too… so maybe in the interest of détente the two of us will get let free with a slap on the wrist.

Why Such a Cold Winter? Praise for G.W.

Theory: This winter is so snowy and cold because it's freezing in Hell.

Check it out, a Hillary Clinton fan blogs appreciation and thanks to President Bush and First Lady Laura Bush.

;)

...we will always be grateful for what George and Laura Bush did this week, with no media attention, when they very quietly went to Ft. Hood and met personally with the families of the victims of this terrorist attack.

FOR HOURS.

The Bushes went and met privately with these families for HOURS, hugging them, holding them, comforting them.

If there are any of you out there with any connection at all to the Bushes, we implore you to give them our thanks…you tell them that a bunch of gay Hillary guys in Boystown, Chicago were wrong about the Bushes…and are deeply, deeply sorry for any jokes we told about them in the past, any bad thoughts we had about these good, good people.

You may be as surprised by this as we are ourselves, but from this day forward George W. and Laura Bush are now on the same list for us as the Clintons, Geraldine Ferraro, Stephanie Tubbs Jones, and the other political figures we keep in our hearts and never allow anyone to badmouth.

Criticize their policies academically and intelligently and discuss the Bush presidency in historical and political terms…but you mess with the Bushes personally and, from this day forward, you’ll answer to us.

We hope someday to be able to thank George W. and Laura in person for all they’ve done, and continue to do. They didn’t have to head to Ft. Hood. That was not their responsibility.

Scrounge around a little, you'll see the author isn't quite what you'd expect from a Hillary supporter... but more importantly you'll understand why "Sometimes the Universe Brings You the Wrong French Toast". Go ahead... check the link. It's a great, personal story about how easy it is to simply accept some of those little accidents that occur. Sometimes an honest mistake isn't a travesty of justice.

Not only that, in a way your reaction can define who you are.